My God is SO faithful...

Wow it has been a LONG time since I updated this blog. I didn't really realize how long it has been. It seems each day that I think of a million things that I want to write about and then by the end of the day I can't seem to find the energy to put my thoughts into words...oh well...hopefully I will be able to find some time and energy to write about the things that God is really teaching me and all that is going on in my heart and head. For now though I want to share with you a story about how God showed His faithfulness to me SO clearly this past week that it totally blew me away:

Many of you know that Ryan, Keane, Gracie and I spent the past 10 days in India. We traveled to three cities (none of which are anywhere near each other) to visit friends and co-workers and get to "see" some of India. Overall the trip went really well and as smoothly as it could while traveling with two 22 month old toddlers (who did AMAZINGLY well considering all that we did and all the places we went!).

Anyway, even though most things went smoothly there were times that I was EXHAUSTED and worn out from the traveling and I have to admit that it often showed in my attitude. This one particular day we had just spent 5 days with our amazing friends in a city in the 'middle of India' and were traveling back to Delhi to stay the night before we left for a 12 hour car ride the next day to Northern India where we would go to Dharamsala. The only flight we could get was at night so we didn't leave our friends until 8:10 pm. That afternoon I had tried a couple of ATM's so that I could get out money for the rest of our trip and neither of them worked (I figured it was just because my bank was blocking my card from being used in India). Ryan and I decided that we would just exchange some of the US dollars we had brought with us into Indian rupees at the airport in Delhi...surely the capital will have places at the airport to exchange money.

When we finally arrived in Delhi at 9:45 pm all of us were wiped out....all we wanted to do was get in a taxi and get to the hotel. Well as soon as we got our luggage we asked about money exchange places and all of the workers directed us outside (which isn't great because once you leave you can't enter back into the airport) saying that there were none inside that were open. Once we arrive at the one money exchange counter they have outside they tell us that they are OUT OF MONEY and they can't help us. At this point we have $600 US dollars on us and 300 Indian rupees (less than $10) and we can't pay for a taxi in dollars and 300 rupees isn't enough. We then decided to try our ATM again and yet again it didn't work. We kept asking and asking for help from all different workers in different shops and all they could tell us was that we could walk about 10 minutes and try another ATM. I was willing to exchange dollars with them for rupees and NO ONE wanted to help us....it wasn't that they were rude, it was just that they weren't helpful at all!

At this point we are TIRED and my attitude is less than admirable and I am upset at Ryan (why? I don't know...I guess he was the one I could take my frustrations out on...I hate that I do that...) and I am about to cry. I realized that I had NO FAITH that God was going to help us and that somehow this would all get worked out. In my heart I had a knowledge that God was with me and that He would provide but unfortunately my actions and attitude didn't show that at all. After pacing around the outside of the airport and talking about all kinds of options we decide to go and ask the money exchange guy one more time if he can help us....of course he says "no". Just as we turn around we see some Tibetan looking people walking up to us. In perfect English they say, "Do you need help?" I wanted to scream..."YES! Please help us!" but instead I just said "yes" and smiled as I held back tears. They asked us how they could help us and said how thankful they were that we would allow them to help us. They said that often when they reach out to help people the people don't trust them and all they want to do is help. They said that they had been watching us walk from place to place with all of our bags and the kids and figured we must need help...it just took them that long to get up the courage to approach us!

We told them the situation and simply asked if they would exchange money with us. Just then they all started speaking to each other (there were 3 of them...2 guys and a girl) in Nepali...it brought a HUGE smile to my face. Here I was in dire need of help and God not only brings someone to reach out and help us but He brings Tibetan Buddhist Nepali speakers (who we work with here in Nepal and come to find out they are all from Sikkim a state in India that is mainly Tibetan Buddhist and their common language that they speak with each other is Nepali). I wanted to reach out and hug them. I felt like I was "home". They said that we didn't need to give them money and that they would help us get a taxi and would stay with us until we get in one...I started to cry. One of the guys looked at me and said, "why are you crying?" and I said, "Because I was just so nervous and I am just so thankful." These guys spent the next 30 minutes running back and forth for us trying to get us a taxi to our guest house (thankfully they also spoke fluent Hindi (the majority language of India) too...amazing!). The wait to get a taxi was about 30 minutes and they even offered for us to go with them in their taxi (which was very funny because it was a normal size taxi and they had 4 people and we had 4 people and they had 2 bags and we had 4 bags and there was NO way that we were all fitting in that one taxi...but it was sweet of them). During the wait they talked with us (and shared some about where their families live and that they are all in college there in Delhi) and tried all they could to get us in a taxi sooner. While the guys were running around the girl stayed with me and Ryan and played with Keane and Gracie...she was beyond sweet to them.

The guys ran back and said they had a taxi for us. We told them how we thought that they were a gift from God and that God had used them to provide for us. We asked them over and over again to take the 300 rupees that we had or to even take the $20 bill (the smallest bill we had on us) in order to pay them back for paying for the taxi (which cost about 400 rupees). They refused over and over again and said that they didn't want anything they ONLY wanted to help us. It brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it. We gave them our cards with our email addresses and asked them over and over again to email us. I REALLY hope they do. As many of you know things like this DO NOT happen (OK..rarely) in South Asia and they happen rarely anywhere in the world (a complete stranger trying to reach out to you and paying for you and denying money when you offer to pay them back!). They were amazing and they are clear and vivid pictures to help me remember that I am never alone and that God is ALWAYS with me. God needs to receive all of the glory!

As I got in the taxi with my family and drove away waving good-bye to my new friends I again began to cry. I couldn't help but be broken before God and apologize to Him for my unfaithfulness...for the fact that I chose to worry about the situation instead of putting my hope, faith and trust in Him that He would work in a mighty way to help us in our time of need. As I held Keane I just wept and felt the love of God SO strongly...it was almost as if I could feel Him wrap His arms around us. It was such an awesome feeling to clearly see God's provision and work in our lives. We are NOT alone. God is with us. He is walking with us and He knows what we need even before we ask. He was faithful when I was unfaithful. I could just picture Him watching me get so upset and scared and Him just trying to say to me,

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, make your requests known to God. And the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7

and

"God will meet all of your needs according His glorious riches in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:19

and

"Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10.

Right as Keane was starting to fall asleep I kissed him and whispered in his ear, "sweet boy go to sleep tonight knowing clearly that God loves us and is holding us in His hand." This is something I know in my mind to be true but at that point (and in many other points throughout my life) I felt it deep, deep in my heart and it was the best feeling in the world.

Thank you God for the ways that you show yourself SO faithful to us. It is our hearts desire to REMEMBER your abundant faithfulness and cling to it during the very hard times when we can't see it as clearly. I love you!

Good to remember...

Right now, when giving is down all over the world including to the organization that we work for, when people are without jobs, when salaries are being reduced, when savings are being eaten up, when things are uncertain, when benefits are changing, when worry sets in, we can be comforted and reminded of what is important through these passages:

1 Timothy 6:17-19
"As for the rich in this present age, charge them not to be haughty, or to set their hopes on the uncertainty of riches, but on God, who richly provides us with everything to enjoy. They are to do good, to be rich in good works, to be generous and ready to share, thus storing for themselves as a good foundation for the future, so that they may take hold of that which is truly life."

Our life's hope is not in things or money. It is in God. He is the one who gives us all things and provides all things for us. We must not hold too tightly to the things of this world. We must be generous with the things we do have and realize that riches of this world are uncertain (as many of us know all too well!) but clinging to God and His promises is certain...we can build our lives on His promises to us. We can trust that life is truly found in God and we must take hold of Him. We cannot live our lives out of fear. The command that is given MOST in the Bible (366 times) is "fear not". God is telling us over and over not to fear. That He will provide all we need. That we must not be afraid of the future or what will happen with us financially. We must be generous and must serve others and be focused outwardly. God will take care of us. He is with us. We must not be controlled by fear or money or material things. We can trust Him. He is our life. Be encouraged today as I was in reading this. I am so thankful for the Lord and His promises to us.

What's in a name?

Months ago, when Keane and Gracie were starting to say sounds and recognize different things and people, they would say something that resembled mama. I am not sure if that is what it actually was but I loved it. It made me feel so special and loved when they said it, even just to think that they were actually beginning to realize that I was their mama. Since then, in the past few months, they had stopped saying anything that resembled ‘mama’ in fact they were actually calling me ‘daddy’. They were calling their daddy, ‘daddy’ and they were sometimes calling me ‘daddy’. I didn’t get upset at this thinking that they were doing it on purpose or anything or thinking that they really didn’t know who I was or anything but until that point (where they stopped referring to me as anything resembling ‘mama’) I really didn’t understand how badly I longed for my children to say my name. To acknowledge me as who I am: their ‘mama’. It was hard for me to understand how they couldn’t get it. I mean they were pointing to dogs and calling them ‘dog’ and they would point to daddy and say ‘daddy’, juice and say ‘juice’, ball and say ‘ball’. I wanted them to hear them say ‘mama’ so badly. I never thought I would feel this way. I never knew that having my children call me by “my name” would mean so much or be so special but I certainly realized it when they weren’t saying it.

One day I was looking at Keane when he was calling me ‘daddy’ and saying, “say mommy” and he said ‘daddy’ and I would say, “say mommy” and he said, ‘daddy’. It was in that moment that I realized it and it impacted me in a way I never imagined: this happens to God ALL the time. He desires for people to know Him, to call Him by His name, to call on Him and He looks at them and says, “say God”, “say Father”, “say Lord” and people look back at him and say “Buddha”, “Vishnu”, “Shiva”, “I don’t believe in God”, “material things”, “wealth”, “prosperity”, etc. They look God in the face and call Him something He is not. They don’t call Him by His name. They simply don’t call on Him. God desires for His children to know Him. He has created that way so that people (all people, 2 Peter 3:9) can know Him and call Him “Father”.

Just the other day, I was holding Gracie and she looked up at me and in the sweetest little voice she said, “mama”. I cannot tell you what a sweet, sweet sound it was. I still don’t really understand why it is that special to me or why it means that much but all I can say is that it does. Every time she says it, it touches a place deep down in my heart and makes me smile. I imagine that when we, whom God sent His only Son to die for, finally look up at Him and call on Him and say, “God”, “Father”, “Lord” that it is one of the sweetest sounds He could ever hear. Now Gracie says, “mama” all the time and I must tell you that I still love it SO much. Keane also says it some but not as much yet as Gracie. Each time they say it, it melts my heart and makes me want to stop what I am doing and look at them and see what it is that they need or want. It also is a HUGE reminder of all of the people who don’t call on the name of the Lord and how much hurt that must cause Him. People that He loves so much who call on the names of other gods or things. We must tell them about the God who loves them so much and who longs to know them, to have a relationship with them to hear them say, “Abba, Father, my God!”
(Psalm 34:3, Joel 2:32, John 20:30-31, Acts 4:12, Romans 10:13, Philippians 2:9-11)

When I finally stop and listen...

Balancing life wearing so many different hats (wife, mom, disciple of Christ, language learner, cook, English teacher, emailer, etc, etc) is often overwhelming. Trying to make sure that I am being intentional with my time and giving 110% to whatever I am doing at the moment is often hard. During the "down-time" of the day, I find that it is hard for me to relax and just be content to sit and enjoy the quietness or the stillness. However, yesterday I had such a unique and special time with the Lord in my community where I actually stopped long enough to really hear from Him...

I teach English on Tuesday and Friday mornings to a few Tibetan woman. Yesterday, I went to my class at our usual time, and the restaurant where I teach these women was closed. So I had to cancel class for the day. I called Ryan (who was home with the kids) and told him the situation and told him that I was going to take some time and just sit at the stupa (the Tibetan Buddhist temple by my home) and pray and listen and talk to some people there. He of course was fine with that and so supportive as usual. I spend a lot of time at the stupa, but most of the time I have a specific purpose or reason to be there. Yesterday, I decided to just sit on the steps of a big Buddhist monastery for a while. At the stupa (it is circular) people walk around and around it and believe that each time they circle the temple they are earning good karma (or merit) for the next life. Because I had time to just sit, pray, watch and listen for the first time in a while, all of it was overwhelming. I began to tear up,and my heart was just so broken as I sat and watched these people that I love, that God loves even more, putting all of their faith and hope into idols made by human hands carved from stone, gold, wood and clay. I saw little old women, so old it was hard for them to walk,bowing down to these idols. I saw teenagers come and get 'blessings' from the Buddhist and Hindu spiritual leaders. I saw people pay respect to and honor a bell made of silver. I saw people give money to monks and nuns so that the monks and nuns would pray for them. I heard horns blaring from monasteries in worship to false gods. I heard monks chanting mantras (many of which they don't even understand). I saw children begging, and I could just go on and on.

Throughout my time, as I watched and prayed, God was revealing things to me and bringing many Scriptures to mind. I just had to pull out a pen and a paper and start writing. Here is a little of what I wrote yesterday:

God, it all seems so hopeless. It seems like it is a never ending cycle. People turn to idols, and then they turn their backs on you. People don't seek truth (Romans 3:11, Jeremiah 29:12-13). They do what makes them feel happy, what they think is right (Proverbs 16). I know that it is not all hopeless. I know that you can bring salvation to these people. That you can tear down their walls, their barriers, their blindness, the things that keep them from knowing you. I know you can do it, and I ask that you PLEASE do it! I can see now (or at least understand a little bit more) why you sent the flood and why you had to destroy your creation at that time. Thank you for speaking to Noah and his family and for saving them from the flood. Thank you that you have provided a way for us to be saved from sin and your wrath (Romans 3:23, Romans 10:9, 1 John 1:9). I know that one day you are going to come again and judge the world. I know that those that don't know you will be eternally separated from you (John 14:6). I know that that breaks your heart so much more than it breaks mine. You love these people more than I ever could. So much so, that you sent your One and Only Son to die for them and for me (John 3:16). You are SO patient and long suffering. Your Word tells us that one day you will return, and I believe that with my whole heart (Matthew 24:36-44). I know you are waiting to return because those that you desire to hear about you haven't yet (Revelation 7:9), because you desire the ones who are here on the earth NOW to know you. It is your desire that no one perish but that ALL PEOPLE come to repentance and come to KNOW you (2 Peter 3:9). I know it must break your heart and make you so sad that so many people around the world, including most of the Tibetan Buddhist people I am looking at now, don't know you. I know you love them. Thank you for loving them. I know that these people aren't going to come to you unless they hear about you and unless we tell them (Romans 10:14, Matthew 28:18-20). I want to tell them about you. I want them to know you, to understand all they can about you, to love you. I want their lives to be transformed and for your name to be famous throughout the Himalayan mountains of Nepal.

God, help me to love the people here (and around the world) as you do. Help me in my language abilities. Open my eyes, my mind, my ears to the ways and places you are working here. I love you and am SO thankful for my salvation. I want to spend my life serving you!

I just wanted to encourage you (and me) today, to share our love for the Lord and His love for all people with those around us today wherever we are. We don't know what tomorrow holds, but we do know that God desires that ALL people would know Him. We have an important role in that, and we are to be the mouthpiece to share the Truth about God and who He is and the relationship He desires with all people. What an awesome privilege that is!

Praying for our children...day 2

This morning at breakfast, I held both Keane and Gracie's hands and looked them in the eyes (they were looking around a bit of course) and I told that them that I was praying everyday for them. I told them that I wanted to pray for them right now and that is what I did...as they mumbled away and looked all around I held their hands and lifted today's prayer up to God. It was such a special time.

Day 2: Growth in grace

"I pray that they (Keane and Gracie) may grow in the grace

and

knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ." 2 Peter 3:18

Praying for our children...

Since the moment I found out I was pregnant with Keane and Gracie I have been praying for them. I have been praying most importantly that they would truly know God and His salvation and live a life that glorifies and honors Him whatever it may cost them. I have prayed that I, as their mom, would always encourage them in that. I of course pray for their health, for their safety, for many, many different things as well. Lately, I have felt a need to really have a way to be in constant prayer over them for specific things. I recently came across a document that I think I was given at a women's retreat here in Kathmandu last year. It is called, "31 Ways to Pray for your Children" by Bob Hostetier. I am not sure who Bob is but on this piece of paper is a list of prayers, one prayer for each of the days of the month along with scripture to pray over our children.

He says, "Each day of the month, in addition to my prayers for their saftey and concerns for that day, I also pray for a specific character trait, virtue or fruit of the Spirit to be planted and nurtured in my children, through my efforts (and my wife's), through the influence of others, and through my children's own actions and decisions."

I began praying on day 1 today. I will try to add a new days prayer each day on my blog so that together we can be in dedicated prayer for our children. I want to see God working in their lives. What a blessing it is and has been when I see Him visibly at work. It is amazing how fast Keane and Gracie are growing. I want to make sure that I am intentional each and every day to lift them up in prayer before my God. I am excited to see all of the many ways that God will answer our prayers.

Day 1: Salvation: "Lord, let salvation spring up within my children, that they may obtain the salvation that is in Christ Jesus, with eternal glory."

Isaiah 45:8

"Shower, O heavens, from above,
and let the clouds rain down

righteousness;

let the earth open, that salvation and

righteousness may bear fruit;

let the earth cause them both to sprout;

I the Lord have created it."

John 1:12

"But to all who did receive him, who believed in His name, He gave the right to become children of God, who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God.

Are we less of a godly woman if we use canned spaghetti sauce??? Part 3

Continued from previous 2 posts...

I feel that we in many ways are living in the past; we've reverted to the past, pre-feminism. As a response to feminism, which in many ways sets up the individual as god, Christianity looked to cultural and social answers for a biblical role of a godly woman. I think that Christian godly woman in the past HAD to make bread, HAD to learn to sew, HAD to make dinner from scratch every night. I think that we have falsely equated what they HAD to do to survive and thrive with what we have to do in this day and age. Is it WRONG to buy store bought bread? Are we less of a godly woman if we use canned spaghetti sauce? MUCH MORE IMPORTANTLY, where does homemaking fit into the work of the Gospel, for which all of God's children are responsible?: certainly it [homemaking] plays a major role, but it is by no means a complete understanding of the role of a Christian woman in the world bringing the Good News to the lost.

I know you have thought these things. And you know what one of the biggest problems is? Because the Christian culture is telling us that these things are most important, our husbands (like us) believe it. So if you don't make bread but Mary from across the street does, then she is doing what she is supposed to, and we are not.

What about teaching our daughters to serve their husbands, families, homes AND to love the lost, to spend time serving others around her, to spend time cleaning the old ladies house down the street, to spend time washing dishes at the homeless shelter, to take food to others to bless them, to share what Christ has done in her life with the world. The only way she is going to learn these things is if we model them in our own lives. This is "Discipleship 101."

Serving others around you does not mean that your home life has to suffer. I definitely don’t think that that is what God intends. It just means that you figure out what is most important and do it and teach it. Figure out what is most important because God says so and not because the world (Christian or not) is telling you so. It would be amazing to know how much the world is changed if every housewife shared her faith with at least one other woman a week, if every housewife not only made bread for her family but also made it for the neighbor's family.

There are many ways to do this and make it happen. Maybe you can sit down with your husband and figure out just one hour a week where he can stay home with the kids and you can get out. For women on this side of the world, this may be easier for you because your husbands' schedules may be more flexible (and many of us have some sort of house help). For ladies whose husbands have full time, set-hour jobs, this may be more difficult, but you also could hire a high school kid to come and stay at home with your children for just one hour while you spend time visiting with ladies on your street. (I encouraged taking your children with you before. These are just ideas if that is not possible or for times you would just like to be able to have a deeper conversation without having to get up every few minutes to take care of the children.)

This all may sound silly, crazy even, but perhaps that is because there is little to no priority given to the Gospel. For wives who have husbands who have flexible work schedules, consider discussing this with him and seeing if there are ways that you can compromise and work out a few hours a week (or one day a week) that he can stay with the children while you go out into the community OR (since I am sure many of you might say that these things won't work) what about inviting women into our home? What about hosting lunches at our home for the ladies on our street and all chipping in to hire a babysitter (even just one babysitter who can be an extra set of hands) and talking about life issues? Serving them?

We make it work for things we want to do (ouch…I am speaking to myself here (in ALL of this) just as much ladies!) like going out to eat with friends, going to the mall or movies, but for some reason when it comes to ministry we have let ourselves become content with serving only within the confines of the home.

Have you ever been around women who say, "I know my ministry right now is to serve my husband and my children and take care of my home, but I am just not happy: I feel something is missing"? I have! I have been around MANY women like this who are battling between what the Christian community is telling them and what they understand Scripture is saying. I think this is because we are imbalanced about what we are teaching women is important, and I think this is because we are settling to stay in our comfort zones in our home and not push each other to look for ways that we can not only serve inside our home but also OUTSIDE among those that need the Gospel (OF COURSE I know your children need the Gospel too, PLEASE don't misunderstand or misread!), need to know God loves them and wants a relationship with them and has a perfect plan for their lives! I think this is also because our husbands are also listening to the "Christian culture" and thinking that we should be happy and content and fulfilled in our duties at home. So, they can't understand (and sometimes don't help) when we want to find some way to serve others in our community.

I think one of the most important things in all of this is the WHY. Why do we want help from our husbands...why do we want time to "get out", etc? Is it because we feel ENTITLED to some time away, because we desire EQUALITY so much, because we are seeking for something else to satisfy us other than our duties at home, because we feel our gifts and talents will be better utilized and appreciated outside of the home? If it is for one of these reasons I think we have MISSED it as well. I am not condoning ANY of these reasons. I am only suggesting that we should "get out" (or invite women in) because of our awesome responsibility as Christian, Jesus following, women to take Christ's love to the lost around us.

I am not asking you to approach your husband and tell him, "I need MY time." I am asking you to consider (and pray about) approaching your husband and explaining to him this INTENSE (God given) desire you have to SERVE your Lord with those around you and explain to him that you might need his help to do so. I am suggesting that you approach your husband and explain to him that you simply want to fulfill what the Lord has asked of you in impacting the world around you in your community BECAUSE of your love for Christ and NOT out of selfish motives.

I venture to say that if we do this, we will all be MORE equipped to serve our families and our home and will be better wives and moms because we are doing exactly what God asked us to do and not spending our days wondering why we feel like 'something is missing' the way that we often do.

I pray that as you have read this you feel LOVE and not condemnation. I pray that you see my humble, learning heart in all of this and not an arrogant spirit. I am not trying to be offensive or to shove my "opinions" down your throat. I am not trying to be a renegade and go against all cultural norms. I am not trying to JUDGE. I am not making a blanket statement that all Christian women are under this impression. I am not trying to put all Christian women in a box. I am trying to do the OPPOSITE!

I am trying to encourage and sharpen you and me. I am trying to hold us all to the correct standard. I am trying to search through Scripture and truly live according to God's plan. I am simply trying to help us all become the women that God has designed us to be.

**OK, I have already heard from a few of you (thanks for commenting) but I want to hear more. For those of you who stuck with me for all three posts, what do you think? I would love to know what this has done in your life. I would love to know your opinion on the matter, what God is teaching you. Leave a comment and let me know. Thanks!

Are we less of a godly woman if we use canned spaghetti sauce??? Part 2

Continued from previous post...

The Bible speaks about the roles of men and women. It also speaks about their worth. In God's eyes, men and women are different (thankfully!!!). They were created differently for a purpose. Thankfully, we have unique gifting and roles and responsibilities, but men and women have the same VALUE and worth. God died for men and women. He gave His life for all of us. His offer of salvation is a free gift for us all.

If we choose to accept his free offer of salvation, then there are certain responsibilities and commands that come along with that for both men and women. We are given the greatest commandment in Matthew 22:37-40, " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'" We also see in the Great Commission that Jesus tells us, "Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age." (Matthew 28:19-20) We see throughout the Bible that we (as Christians, Christ followers) are to love and to serve others around us, to humble ourselves and serve our family, neighbor, friend or foe.

I hear so much about baking bread for your husband but what about baking bread for your husband AND your neighbors. Or what if instead of baking bread, you buy it at the store and spend that hour out in your front lawn or walking around your neighborhood meeting other moms like you and building relationships with them, relationships with them that lead to you being able to pour into her life and share with her about the amazing love of Christ.

Now, I am not saying that this should take away from your home or your children. Take your children with you: you are called to be a disciple-maker, and your children should be your number one disciples. Try and meet other women who have children their same age. They can play while you talk, not just for your social enjoyment or outlet but also for the purpose of the Gospel, in accord with your role as a Christian. I think we have lied to ourselves and have come to believe that staying home all day long every day and taking care of our family is enough, or that our role and service as a Christian woman within the home is enough, or is only what we are to be doing as a godly woman. I think we, in pursuit of serving God and our families in making our home a safe, comfortable haven, we have (in some ways) made a trap and snare for ourselves. Our home has become a place of worth to us, a place where we feel in control, where we feel powerful. We have made it hard for ourselves to venture outside of that comfort zone.

Oh, it is hard for me to say these things, because I don't think it is wrong to focus your energy and attention on your family. I don't think it is wrong to make fresh bread or make your home a comfortable place for your husband, but what I am saying and want to ask you is, "Is it enough?" As a Christian woman are you TRULY finding fulfillment in it (not personal fulfillment but do you feel you are doing all God is asking you to do?) I would venture to say that (if you are like me) many of you are not. You feel like there is something more, something more you can be doing, something more you can be pouring your life into. I am NOT saying that you need to spend 40 hours a week outside of your home (come on…there are things to do: dishes to wash, laundry to do, floors to sweep, food to make, naps to get (for the children of course :)), toys to play with, stuff to teach), but what I am saying is,

Is there time in your day that you could be spending in a way that impacts the kingdom of God outside of your home? Are their ways that you can be more intentional about reaching out to the woman around you every day? Are there ways that (after making sure your husband and children are getting the attention, love, care, example and service from you) that you can reach out to those outside of your family? Is making bread or learning to sew (although NOT bad things) what makes a godly woman?

To be continued tomorrow...

Are we less of a godly woman if we used canned spaghetti sauce?? Part 1 of 3

God has really been working in my heart and life lately and I have really been processing it and thinking through a lot of it. After praying about it, talking to some amazing godly women (who are some of my best friends) and discussing what the Lord had been convicting me of, I felt compelled to actually write some of it down and share it with you.

It is my desire and prayer that it will encourage all women (both you and me) to fulfill our God given responsibilities to take the Gospel to the lost, to love the Lord and to think of creative ways to do that in our amazing roles as wives, mothers, daughters and friends. I pray that God will speak to you as He has me as you read these next few posts (this is a LONG one so I have broken it into 3 parts that I will post over the next 3 days!)…

One of my friends who lives in South Asia recently said, "A huge reason I am alive is so God can use me in other people's lives." At that time it hit me and I took a second and wrote it down. I think often we get so busy and focused on what we need to do and what we want or how we feel that we forget to see that there are those all around us that we can serve.

I also think this goes beyond just our home. Recently, God has been speaking to me about what it means to be a godly woman, wife, and mother. As I have ventured into this new role of mom just 7 ½ short months ago, I have been evaluating what my new life should look like. I have been asking myself what the Bible says about this. I have been comparing it with what the "Christian culture" in America says and what the world says. To be honest, I am struggling with my findings right now.

Recently, I have been reading many Christian blogs and websites (I tend to spend a lot of time "blog jumping") about what it means to be a godly wife and mother these days. What I am finding has gotten me thinking: so much of what I find when I read about what it means to be a godly wife and mom is focused around "homemaking," or what it means to be a godly wife, mom, woman in the home among your family.

Now, I can see the big guns coming out now…just bear with me please.

These websites focus on teaching your daughter to be a homemaker and teaching her to love the home, love serving her husband, love serving her children, to be content washing dishes and cleaning and decorating her home. [Of course these are wonderful, necessary aspects of being a godly woman.] These sites teach that your daughters (and your) primary service, primary godly role, should be in the home, should be loving the home and making it a safe and comfortable haven for your family. They teach about the importance of making fresh bread, healthy food and nice curtains for your family. Now, what I am NOT saying is that these things are bad, because they certainly are not! But, what I have found difficult as I read these blogs is that I feel something HUGE is missing. I talk to SO many other wives who are serving over here in South Asia (and around the world), and they say things like, "I could be doing what I am doing in America. I don't even know why I live in this country. I just stay home all day and take care of my kids and my home. I never get to get out. I haven't learned language. I haven't met any national women."

I realize that what is happening (and has happened) is that the Christian church is fighting against the feminist movement that says that women should have equal responsibilities to men and that they should be "allowed" and "encouraged" to work outside of the home and that working in the home is not a worthy cause, etc, etc. (In other words, women and men are to have individual-focused lives, which is to the sacrifice of a biblical understanding of family, parenting, and all relationships in general.) But, what I think has happened instead is that we have taken it to the other extreme. What it boils down to is that I have not found much biblical evidence that a woman's "job" and calling is to stay home and make bread and cookies and clean her home all day long, only (Proverbs 31:10-31, among others). I am struggling with the fact that the church (my experience is mainly in America) is telling women that it is. My struggle is not with the role of a woman regarding her home and family, but the limitation of a woman to this disregarding her general calling and role as a Christian.

I am struggling with the fact that many Christian men and families feel that it is the husbands' responsibility (only) to be a light to the world, to go out into the community, to serve the world, leaving it the wives' job to be the light to her family and her children and her home. Again, these things are NOT bad but I think we are imbalanced. I think we have missed it.

Of course someone in the family has to work and from biblical example and teaching we can see that it is usually the man (or father) of the home who is the one who works outside of the home. So, then simple logistics say that the woman (unless she has to work) will be home with the children. If the children are home schooled or under school age, then the children will be home all day with the mother and the children and the home will become the woman's PRIMARY place of service. This makes sense and I don't think there is anything wrong with it (actually I am a huge supporter of stay at home moms. I pray that I can be one my entire life and serve and take care of my children at home. I think it is very important. I also am not saying that a full time job outside of the home is the goal, which has become a problem in American society to the detriment of the family. I am not saying that at all. I feel a job outside of the home CAN keep us from not having time to love and serve our family, AND even when women work outside of the home, it doesn't mean that they are being intentional about serving those around them). The problem I think comes when we say, "This [homemaking] is it," when we settle for serving ONLY inside our home, yes I said settle.

TO BE CONTINUED TOMORROW…

Lots to say...

I had the amazing opportunity to attend a ladies retreat here in Kathmandu during the first week of October. A wonderful group of ladies came from America to serve and minister to about 10 ladies (including me) who are serving here in South Asia. It was a wonderfully refreshing, fun and worshipful time. God spoke to me so much throughout the week. Over the next couple of posts I would like to share with you some of the things I heard that really spoke to me. Most of them are just one line quotes from the ladies who were teaching or words from a friend during small group time, but God used them mightily in my life to make me think and reflect and make changes. I pray that God will speak to you through these words as He has me.

P.S. The wonderful ladies served us and gave us pedicures, facials and massages. Here you can see me and some friends getting pedicures....I know...we are spoiled!