Things I have learned and things that have been confirmed in my life since Ryan has been gone...

I thought I would take some time while it is fresh on my mind to post about a few things that I have learned and others that have been confirmed in my life through this past week or so with being without Ryan. (You can read my earlier posts about Ryan traveling by clicking Post #1 and Post #2).

1. My love for Ryan has been CONFIRMED to me through his being gone. I love him so much and I knew it of course but it just confirms it a million times over to do life without him for a while. I never want to be without him. He is my best best friend, an amazing father and the most wonderful husband.

2. The fact that raising twins is much easier and more fun when Ryan is around has been CONFIRMED in his absence.

3. I have LEARNED a lot more about being a mom and what I (with God and other's grace and help of course) am capable of. I have learned that I can take care of both of my babies by myself for an extended period of time. I have figured out "tricks of the trade" that I may never have had to figure out had Ryan been right there to help me. Tricks that will be very useful even when he is home like singing and dancing for the babies so they will stop crying or how to feed both of them at the exact same time (I am able to do this now with both bottles and baby food).

4. I have LEARNED to rely more on other people to help with my babies and to simply help me through this. With Ryan by my side, he and I have a great system as to how we take care of the babies together and we work as a team. There have been few times that we have needed to ask for help (although many people have helped us and it has been wonderful). With grandparents and other family far away it is hard to find people who I trust enough to leave my babies with or who I want to have feed them a bottle or hold them when they are crying or watch them for an hour while I run to the store or exercise, etc and the people who I would trust have their own families to be responsible for and are very busy with them (although many of them would be more than willing to take care of G and K and have offered on many occasions). Anyway, all of that to say that this week or so I have had to rely a lot more on others to help me in many different ways. I have had to step out and ask for help and have even had the girl who works in my home and her sister come a few days this week to watch the babies for an hour so I could go across the street and just get out a bit and get some exercise. That is a first for us. But through it all, everyone has been so amazing and helpful. The two days I went out and took the babies with me, people came to help me get into the taxi and all of my neighbors (the ones who live in my same house) met me downstairs when the taxi arrived in the evening to help me carry my things and the babies up the stairs. I have learned to let go more from trying to do everything myself (or just with Ryan) and have been amazed at the ways that others have ministered to me by helping me.

4. It has been CONFIRMED that I can not go anywhere completely by myself with two babies. In America I think I could (although I know it would still be very difficult) with a car, strollers and good (not dirt) roads to push the stroller around on but right now I am definitely not in America! Like I said, I did get out twice this week with the babies (once to go to a ladies lunch and another time to go to a new families flat) and both times I needed a lot of help but as you can see from #3 help was there!

5. I have LEARNED that I love having unlimited access to the computer and have enjoyed not having to share it. Maybe I need my own computer...haha!

6. It has been CONFIRMED to me that taking care of two babies by myself makes me TIRED.

7. I have LEARNED that cooking for one is so hard and I would rather not even plan a meal since it is just me eating it so I have been just eating cereal or sandwiches for dinner each night.

8. I have LEARNED that I can stay by myself at night and be OK. I know this may sound silly but I wasn't sure how I would do and was really apprehensive about it but God has been so gracious to me and so far so good.

9. It has been CONFIRMED to me how much I like blogging and enjoy reading others blogs since I have had more time to spend on blogs since Ryan has been gone and I have the computer to myself.

10. It has been CONFIRMED to me that I love being married (and that I am not an "alone" person) and wouldn't trade it for the world. I am so thankful God has blessed me with a husband who I can do life with. I can't wait for him to return home in a few days.

I promise the following story is true in its entirety....

I have been meaning to sit down and blog about this since the moment it
happened yesterday but I am just now finding the time to do it and even now probably only have time to write half of this post and will finish the second half later but I just HAVE to tell you about how my morning started yesterday...

OK, so it's about 7:30 am. Gracie and Keane had gotten up at 6 am and they were playing together for a few minutes in their pack and play (that happened to be in my bedroom) while I got a few things done. All of a sudden Gracie starts crying very loudly and I went in to see what was wrong. Well, she had a VERY dirty diaper. So, I took her from the pack and play to their bedroom across our apartment. Just as I removed her diaper and began cleaning her up I heard a bird fly into our home (yes, a bird!) it was SO loud and it was flapping its wings like crazy. I went into panic mode (or survival mode if I want to make it sound a bit more positive) and immediately thought of Keane in the other room by himself. I thought, "oh no! the bird is going to find Keane and peck him but what do I do with Gracie...she has poop everywhere?" So my quick thinking mom brain (notice the sarcasm here, remember I am still in "survival mode") decided the best thing to do is to put her down on the carpet on a towel that was nearby and just pray she did not move much and get poop all over the room (at this point, that was the least of my concerns) and I ran with my hands on my head to Keane and closed the door to the room he was in so the bird (which I found out was definitely a pigeon after I got a good look at him) wouldn't bother him. I then went back to check on Gracie (she was fine although she was moving all over the room...ahhh I am laughing as I write this) and then opened up as many windows as I could and I ran out onto my balcony and began calling for my guard who lives downstairs to come up and help me.

Meanwhile, I step back inside my house and notice that there is not one pigeon but TWO nasty pigeons in my house who are both scared to death (and are probably husband and wife pigeons since they both reside together in the ventilation hole above my stove...more on that later) and are flying back and forth around my living room and kitchen....gross...and pigeons are NOT small birds! Well, my guard never came up but thankfully one of my neighbors happened to be walking downstairs and I said, "help me please! there are two birds in my house!" she came into the house (laughing mind you) and tried to get them to fly out the window. Every time she tired to shoe them away they just flew to the other side of the room and I would duck and cover my head (all I could picture in my head is the scenes from movies when birds are attacking people and pecking away at their heads). My neighbor was laughing so hard at me and while I was crouched down on the ground I was laughing to myself thinking about what a good blog post and fun story to tell Ryan this was going to be (I lost my focus for a minute or two...haha). Then my neighbor called her mom and she came down (all the while they are laughing at my reactions and seem utterly calm about the entire ordeal...apparently this happens quite often in Nepal). I remained crouched on the floor while they dealt with getting the birds outside where they belonged...They were able to finally get them out by opening the front door and the mother shoeing the birds towards the door and yelling to the daughter to open it. It was quite an ordeal and I am definitely glad that there are no more birds in my house. Except for a little pigeon poop (that I thoroughly cleaned up...gross) they didn't mess anything else up.

How did the birds get into the house in the first place you ask? Good question...in Nepal most of the homes have a hole (larger than necessary and not sealed) in the side of the kitchen wall where the vent from the stove runs out and in my home, there is a tube that runs from the stove to the hole...unfortunately these pigeons have been spending WAY too much time in the tube and we have tried to get them to stay out many different times and ways but yesterday the tube split in half allowing pigeons free entrance into our home! My guard fixed the tube and put it back together, so for that I am thankful BUT the love birds are STILL hanging out in there and it is driving me crazy. They make the pigeon coo all day long and flap around in there...it is loud and annoying. As soon as Ryan gets back I am going to ask him to put screen over the hole so we can be done with this problem once and for all!

What would you have done in a situation like that??? I would like to say, "only in Nepal" but I know that is not true, I am sure stuff like this happens around the globe. Anyone else have any crazy bird or rodent in the house stories to share??

I wish, wish, wish I had pictures to share but alas Ryan has our camera in the mountains. So, for visual stimulation, you will have to settle for a photo of pigeons from the Internet!

I miss my husband...but God is GOOD!

I thought I would take a minute and update you on life without Ryan being here. First of all, I have heard from him twice and he and all of the guys are doing really well except for the fact that it has been raining A LOT! But they said aside from that and being sore they are really enjoying their time and are right on schedule so far!
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God has been so gracious to me. As I mentioned in an earlier post this is very new territory for our family to be apart for so long but by God's amazing grace I am doing really well. Of course I miss my husband and I wish he were here BUT I am so excited for him and all that he is being able to experience and so thankful for the opportunities God has given me so far being here in Kathmandu in my home. To be honest, I haven't left my home (except for one hour to take a walk with a friend) in 4 whole days (which is a big deal for me. Usually at minimum I go to the market or to the gym each day) but God has given me amazing opportunities to serve Him and fellowship with friends from my home while taking care of the babies. I actually have been alone very little since Ryan has been gone. I have had American friends come to visit, Tibetan friends come to visit, my house helper is here almost everyday (What a BLESSING...I plan to post more about this topic later), had the sleep-over with the girls (previous post) and spent some time with a few neighbors. I am blessed to have friends who are coming to spend time with me and people I am able to serve straight from my home. I am very grateful. I was especially worried about being alone at night and God has also answered my prayers regarding that. It is certainly not my favorite thing to be alone with the babies at night but it has not been bad at all. I know God has been with me.
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The main challenge and learning has been from taking care of two babies without Ryan. Things have gone very smoothly and each day I am learning tricks from the previous day which help the next day go even smoother. The hardest part was the first evening getting them ready for bed. They are so used to eating at the same time and getting their bottle right after their bath not to mention the fact that about an hour before bedtime they start to get SOOOOOO ready for bed and I failed to prepare for all of this the first night so I unfortunately had two screaming babies all through baths and up until bottle time because they both were hungry and had to wait while the other was taking a bath and by the time I was ready to give them their bottles they were both screaming their heads off (poor things!) I usually just tend to the one who is crying harder first but in this instance I think they were both crying as hard as they could so I did what any mother of twins would probably do in that situation...I left...NO of course not! I picked up both of them one in each arm and fed them both at the exact same time. They were so hungry that it worked well but definitely is not the way I would choose to do it for each feeding. The next night I learned from my mistakes and started baths early and was able to bathe and give Gracie a bottle before Keane even realized that it was his turn for bath and bottle. Learning from mistakes (ignorant or otherwise) is so wonderful. Not my favorite way to learn but sometimes it is the only way!
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Just 6 more days until Ryan comes home. Tomorrow I don't have much planned except trying to get on a lot of stuff done on the computer. I need to do it so I am looking forward to having the time. I am so thankful that God is always with us so that we are truly never alone.

We are princesses...we are special!

Last night I had the amazing privilege of hosting 12 young girls at my home for a "princess party" sleepover (and I certainly wasn't alone, two of my amazing teammates and my friend who runs the children's home helped out too)! These 12 girls are amazing! They range in age from 10-15 and live at a children's home here in Kathmandu run by one of my British friends. The home is a wonderful Christian home where the children learn first and foremost about Christ and how He can change them. They also learn how to be kind and loving, grateful, honest and helpful, among other things. These girls were an absolute JOY to have in my home. They are all from small Himalayan villages north of Kathmandu. There are no other known believers among their people except for the kids in the home. There are 23 total (the boys were jealous that the girls got to come over for a fun night but when Ryan gets back he is taking them to play soccer and have ice cream!) Our party definitely had a theme and that was PRINCESSES. We began the evening with singing and talking about the Bible together. I was able to teach these girls that as Christians, as the King's (God's) daughters, they were special. VERY special. We went through verses that showed that God is the king of kings (1 Timothy 6:15-16) and verses where it explains that God loves us SO much that he calls us "children of God" (1 John 3:1a) and I taught them that even if everyone around them forgets them or if they feel that their friends, family and others don't love them, that God NEVER forgets them, that He always loves them. That in fact, He has written them on the palm of his hands Isaiah 49:15-16). I asked them, "OK, so if God is the king of kings and you are His daughters, what does that make you????" "His PRINCESSES" they all responded loudly together! They loved hearing these things as BIG smiles lit up their faces as I looked at them and said, "God loves you SO much that He allows you to be His child and He gives you the right to be His princesses. He thinks you are SO special and He will NEVER forget you because you are written on His hand." What an honor it was to spend time with these precious girls and simply remind them of who they are in Christ.

It was a short message kept so simple so that the girls could grasp it and really understand. But isn't it an amazing one? I pray that this simple truth encourages you as it has me. As Christians, we are special. God LOVES us and will NEVER forget us. We are His princesses, He is our King.

We spent the rest of the evening eating way too many sweets, decorating cupcakes, blowing bubbles off the balcony, making princess crowns and jewelry out of silver pipe cleaners, drawing princess pictures, eating chicken quesadillas, doing each other's hair, playing with (and bathing and feeding) Gracie and Keane, and watching Enchanted. We then woke up in the morning (at about 6 am) and ate cinnamon rolls and eggs and did each other's make-up, gave pedicures and watched Air Buddies. They girls all left by 10:30 am and now it is 12:30 and I am TIRED. But a great tired. What a great weekend!

New Territory...

My husband is leaving tomorrow for a 10 or so day trek in the Himalayan mountains. He is going with 4 of his great friends and is going to be able to serve God in some of the remotest and most difficult to reach places in the world. I am excited for him and SO happy that he has this opportunity and is taking it. I can't wait to hear about all that God does and to see pictures and hear about all of their crazy adventures BUT I am also sad. I am sad that we will be apart for 10 days. We have been married for 5 years and dated for 3 before that. In our married life we have only been apart for two nights (and they weren't consecutive) and both times I was staying with family or friends. I will miss him. I know God is with me and will give me the strength I need to take care of Gracie and Keane each day and I am SO grateful that I have Lhakpa (the girl who helps me around the house) coming each day and good friends (American, Tibetan and Nepali) to help me whenever I need it. I am confident that we all will be fine and do fine BUT I will miss him. Ryan is my best friend and we do practically everything (or as much as we can do now with two little ones) together. We love being together and so it will be strange not having him around. I do have some fun things planned while he is away that I am really looking forward to such as hanging out with girl friends that are in town because their husbands are also on the trek and having a sleep-over with my good friend here and 6 of the Tibetan teenage girls from the children's home she runs. There are also some errand type things to do and of course there is always email and blogging and my never ending list of stuff to-do on the computer and then add that to taking care of my amazing babies and I am sure the 10 days will fly by. We are entering new territory here in the Parker family and it will be interesting to see how it all goes...I should be updating the blogs regularly (except that Ryan is taking the camera so pictures will be limited, I am supposed to be borrowing one from a friend though) so stay tuned....

Just one of those days...

Yesterday was "just one of those days" not a bad day, just a "blah" day. I felt that way pretty much from the moment I got up. I was sleepy, not feeling 100% and simply "blah". Then Gracie and Keane did not have their best day. They seemed to be sleepy too and we are working on getting them on a different schedule...you know moving from 5 bottles to 4 with more solids. I find it to be a difficult transition right now. Figuring out when to give the milk, when to give the solids.

The entire time that they were on just bottles, it worked amazingly well for us. It was pretty cut and dry, every 3 hours during the day give a bottle and then they would nap between practically every bottle. Even when they began eating a bit of solids it was fine too (see previous post about our schedule then) but now, at almost 7 months, that has changed and it seems to be changing so quickly, everyday I am having to re-evaluate what I am doing (I am sure many of you know what I am talking about). They are still sleepy but don't want to sleep as much because they are now so curious and into everything, they still definitely LOVE their bottles but also LOVE food. They get so excited when they see that little cup and spoon. And, trying to stretch them to four hours, figure out when to give them their solid foods (with the bottles, as a snack, some with, some separate) and figuring out when to carve out the best time for some naps in this new schedule has been tricky. I have been trying different options of schedules that are modifications of the schedule we were on and are ideas from other websites and books I have read.

Today is my third day really trying to nail a new great schedule down. I am finding that this is the first major time that trying to schedule twins has been pretty difficult. In our situation, feeding them bottles every few hours worked well and since they were eating at basically the same time for most of their feedings their nap schedule was also pretty much the same but now, with more components of the schedule to deal with, I am finding that they are more often napping at different times, waking at different times, etc.

I realize that with twins (or even for a single baby for that matter) and adding food and their personalities, that it is never going to be simple cut and dry "3:00 pm on the dot peas and then 4:00 on the dot nap for both of them for 2 hours..." I know that but what I am looking for is just a BETTER schedule then we have now. Now I know generally what is going to happen in the day but I am at a strange point where I am trying to figure out if they are sleepy and need more naps, if they are hungry and want more food, if they are missing that one extra bottle I am trying to drop each day, etc. Before when it was just a bottle every three hours, I knew (95% of the time) why they were crying and what they needed. Now we are in this muddled area that I am not sure what they are upset about because I don't have the feedings and naps down for this stage in their growth yet. They are still sleeping amazingly well through the night (6:30 pm - 6:30 am). I would like to be able to put them to bed a half an hour later or more but with the way things are right now they are SO ready to go to bed by 6:30 which works fine for me but I would like them to begin sleeping a little later in the morning and I know that won't happen until they are going to bed a bit later because they are already sleeping an amazing 12 hours...which I am SO thankful for.

And so, here in lies the dilemma which made my blah day a little more difficult yesterday because I was not in the best of spirits and neither were my two precious babies. I am looking forward to getting a good schedule worked out for all of us. The wonderful thing about having children is that even in the blah days it does not take much effort to find something that makes you smile or makes you thankful. Here are just a few things from yesterday that made my "blah" day a little brighter:

- My trip to run errands with Keane yesterday and having him fall asleep on me in the taxi.
- The fact that Gracie is beginning to crawl a bit and had the biggest smile on her face when she "broke free" from the play area we created for them on the floor.
- The times throughout the day that I would be holding Keane and he would pull my face into his just to be close to me.
-Watching Ryan lay on the floor and play with them while I got lunch made and seeing them smile at their dad.
- That even when they were both upset and crying before their bath we put them facing each other so they could see each other and they began laughing at each other so loudly for a long time.

I am so grateful to God for my family. I desire to serve them and love them abundantly. They are undeserved gifts from Him. Today I woke up feeling more refreshed and ready for the day. Right now Gracie and Keane are napping. We will see how today's "schedule testing" goes. I will let you know when we find one that works! Have a great day and don't forget to allow God to show you the many things around you that you have to be thankful for (small and big) even if today is one of your "blah days".

**Anyone have any advice for schedules that worked for you at this point??? I would LOVE to hear them!

Obedience Part 3: Solomon's disobedience and punishment.

Yes, you read the title correctly...after the clear direction and amazing promises from God, King Solomon STILL chose to disobey! He KNEW the consequences and disobeyed. Not only that, he knew the "rewards" if he obeyed and disobeyed! UGGHHH. All I can say is UGGHHH. Reading about this makes me SO frustrated but unfortunately, I can relate so much. Often times I know what God is directing me to do or what He wants me to and I simply do not do it for one reason or another. It makes me sad to think of the ways that I have clearly disobeyed God and how much it must hurt Him. Let's take a look at how Solomon disobeyed and what happened as a result from 1 Kings 11:1-13...

We learn that Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines!!!!! from many different nations. The nations these women represented are nations that the Lord had told the Israelites not to intermarry with. God said,

"You must not intermarry with them, because they will surely turn your hearts after their gods." (1 Kings 11:2a)

Remember from the promises that God had made to Solomon that God said that he needed to keep His statutes and commandments. Well, this clearly was one of his statutes. And Solomon clearly did not obey,

"Nevertheless, Solomon held fast to them [foreign women] in love." (1 Kings 11:2b)

And what happened??? Exactly what the Lord had said would happen...

"As Solomon grew old, his wives turned his heart after other gods, and his heart was not fully devoted to the Lord his God, as the heart of David his father had been....So Solomon did evil in the eyes of the Lord; he did not follow the Lord completely, as David his father had done." (1 Kings 11:4,6)

And the Lord became angry with Solomon because his heart had turned away from Him even after He appeared to him twice (1 Kings 11:9) So, the Lord said to Solomon,

"Since this is your attitude and you have not kept my covenant and my decrees, which I commanded you, I will most certainly tear the kingdom away from you and give it to one of your subordinates. Nevertheless, for the sake of David your father, I will not do it during your lifetime, I will tear it out of the hand of your son. Yet I will not tear the whole kingdom from him, but will give him one tribe for the sake of David my servant and for the sake of Jerusalem, which I have chosen." (1 Kings 11:11-13)

God is true to His word. Solomon was punished and God was gracious enough to wait and withhold the punishment until his son's generation but doesn't that almost seem like worse punishment to you in the long run? Knowing that a decision you made to disobey is causing your son to be punished? I think so. I would imagine that Solomon thought about it. Too late unfortunately.

I find it so interesting that when God spoke to Solomon he said, "Since this is your ATTITUDE". The truth of the matter is that Solomon's outward actions are a reflection of his inward heart. God is concerned about the heart and the reason behind WHY King Solomon is doing this. I would imagine that it is because King Solomon does not trust God enough to believe His promises. To believe that God's design is best. He is fearful of God's plan and simply does not trust Him. Ever been there??? If we are honest we probably all have been there. On the outside we would say that we trust God but do our actions show that???

I will tell you that I have learned so much from this part of King Solomon's story. I want to serve and obey God all of my life. I want to know what He wants me to do and I want to do it. The truth is though that we NEED HIM. We cannot do it on our own strength as much as we say we want to. I am thankful for the lessons I am able to learn from reading about Solomon's mistakes. I pray that my life will be filled with obedience to my God. I am so thankful that HE has a plan for my life and my families lives. His plan and His desires are best. Let's not make the same mistake as Solomon. We must encourage each other always to seek after God and to follow His will at all times and not our own.